This is my impressed face. Can you tell?

Hoo, boy. I just got a comment on my abortion article, and I can’t tell if it’s laughable or just sad. It’s just a bunch of condescension from someone who certainly hasn’t earned the right to condescend even the four-year-old they write about. Put on your softest gloves before you read this—you’re in for some facepalm material. My comments are in red.

its just astonishing! A person can have brains and yet be so miseducated. (Find me a person without brains, and I’ll wonder why you’ve brought me a corpse.) Perhaps God in his wisdom and humour spread stupidity evenly across humanity irrespective of each intellect. (Oh, there’s a good argument: anyone you disagree with is stupid. Look at the wit on this one!)
Even a child of four knows what is in mums womb. (Well, I guess we know how to save a lot of money on pregnancy tests now!) Now that child may feel they will lose time with mum but they nevertheless know a sister or brother is in their and that the womb protects him or her while so small and defenceless. (Look at the grammar on this one…)
The child wold never jump up and down on her while her mother is pregnant. (Never? Really? That’s quite a claim. You sure you don’t want to walk that one back a bit? No? Okay, then.) Nor would the child think of that pregnancy as a mere question. (Pregnancy isn’t a question. Pregnancy is pregnancy.) For that child the mother has a baby sister or brother in a protective case. (So older siblings own their younger siblings? I don’t think that’s a very good idea.) Its not a question of will she ever see her brother or sister or when. (Do you want to point out what a bad idea it is to think of a fetus as a brother or sister before it’s actually born into the world, or should I? There’s this old adage about counting chickens, and something like a quarter of pregnancies end in spontaneous abortion…)
When the mother tells her child shall she…. it does terrible harm. (You’re missing a grammatical object and an antecedent for that pronoun. Too bad God doesn’t provide copy editing services.) Think about it….mum asks a four year old…shall we kill your little brother or sister? (Why the hell would anyone ask this question? If you’re trusting a potentially major life decision to your four-year-old, you’ve got some serious problems.) What would her or his response be? (Since children are pretty ignorant, it probably wouldn’t be the right response, which I peg as something along the lines of “Mommy, getting an abortion would not be ‘killing my little brother or sister.’ Please seek psychological counseling because you are asking your four-year-old child for medical advice.”)
You can philosophize as much as you like but you wont get closer to the truth unless you have the heart of a child… (This person is obviously doing too much thinking with their heart and not enough with their brain. That probably explains the overall quality of this submission.) i mean a modicum of humility but you proud vain men continue in your revolting rants. (Ah yes, having opinions based on logical reasoning is just so vain and proud. I really should be ashamed, shouldn’t I?)

No doubt, dear reader, you will be surprised to discover that this deeply insightful comment has not succeeded in showing me the error of my terrible, sinful ways. I am no more convinced  by this commenter’s vacuous, inept failure to present (and punctuate!) a coherent thought than I am the living embodiment of King Solomon himself.  (Ah yes, if you want to see a Grade A baby-killing, look no further than that the god of the Bible.)

A suggestion to any future commenters of this magnitude? Your malformed convictions, no matter how strongly held, are worth nothing without at least paying lip service to reason. If you cannot manage to communicate your thoughts in at least a skillful manner as your average middle schooler, do yourself a favor and keep them to yourself.

2 responses to “This is my impressed face. Can you tell?

  1. Bad grammar and obviously the wrong tone. It sounds like something many pro-lifers would think, though. i.e. “I have no idea how anybody could believe such a thing!”. In my opinion, they guy’s mistake was articulating those thoughts here. It’s bound to be unproductive. And there is his grammar too.

    He’s incredulous because he thinks the pro-life position is one even children can get. You don’t think he should be. I recommend that the both of you avoid further correspondence. The tone will make it pointless.

    On a different note, I was once going through alleged Biblical inaccuracies with my 11 year old sister and we got to one of those allegations made by people who obviously can’t read and she said “That’s not what the text says!”. Give children more credit. They can be very bright.

  2. To be honest, I generally prefer not to make comments about people’s grammar because it’s offensively dismissive to ignore someone’s argument in order to focus on something so small. In this case, though, there wasn’t really much of an argument to begin with…

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